BILLY McCORD: As I see it


I am writing this message on Saturday night, a patient at North Mississippi Medical Center in Tupelo. The column will be short this week, because I am scheduled for a procedure to be done on Sunday. I appreciate each and every message I have received from you and always enjoy hearing from you.
According to the weather man another cold blast will reach our area early
this week bringing frigid conditions again. Every spring and summer I hear people remark, “If we had enough cold weather, we would not be bothered with insects.” I hope I do not hear this when warm weather gets here because I will be assured there is some other cause for bugs than the lack of cold weather. We have not received snow, sleet or ice this winter, but we surely have had a lot of very cold weather.
I appreciate the calls and e-mails I received during my last attempted joke. This week someone told me a story that I appreciated.
Three young men were having dinner with their uncle and he announced rather abruptly that he was getting married. The uncle was in his middle eighties, had never been married and his three nephews could not believe what they heard. One of the nephews looked at his uncle and said, “This lady must be the prettiest woman in the world.”
The uncle responded, “No, no she is rather homely,”
The second nephew said, “I know why you are marrying her. I bet she has a pile of money.”
The uncle said, “No son, she is as poor as Old Job’s turkey.”
The third young man said, “Uncle, I bet she is the finest cook you could find anywhere.”
The uncle looked at him and said, “No, in fact she cannot cook. We always have to go out somewhere to eat because she cannot cook a meal.”
The first nephew said, “Well, if she is not the prettiest lady in the world and she has no money and she can’t cook, then please tell us why you
want to marry her.”
The uncle looked at the three nephews and said, “Boys, she is able to drive at night.”
I am happy to announce that I returned home Sunday afternoon and the
report from the doctors was good. Thanks for your concern.

Billy McCord is a retired school administrator and an Elder in the United Methodist Church. He is Pastor of Shady Grove UM Church in Calhoun County. He is a member of the Calhoun County School Board. Contact him at

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,