MOVIE REVIEW: Talented cast can’t save ‘Piranha 3D’

Here’s what you need to know about “Piranha 3D”: Women take their tops off, then get eaten by prehistoric piranha, all in three dimensions.
Oddly enough, talented people took part in this film, and one assumes they cashed big paychecks.
Color me surprised when none other than Richard Dreyfuss shows up in the first scene singing a sea shanty. Dreyfuss doesn’t survive long, probably because nobody wants to see him topless.
Hey, Elizabeth Shue keeps her top on as Sheriff Foster. She knows something’s wrong in a small Arizona lake town, but it’s Spring Break and those crazy kids won’t listen to reason until they start losing body parts.
When someone catches one of the piranha, the sheriff takes it to Mr. Goodman. This is my favorite part because Mr. Goodman is played by Christopher Lloyd of “Taxi” and “Back to the Future” fame.
(I could picture Doc Brown from “Back to the Future” saying, “These fish are meat-eaters, Marty, and you’re the main course.”)
We also get some kids who don’t do what their mother says. One of them cuts her foot and walks in the water. It’s a tense moment.
I found myself twisting in my seat a couple of times, but then something stupid happens on screen to bleed away the tension.
When one character meets an incredibly stupid end, I couldn’t tell if he was supposed to be heroic or idiotic. That’s part of the charm of “Piranha 3D.”
If you’re in the mood for a movie that’s so bad it’s good, “Piranha 3D” might qualify.
I give it a D minus. (Without Christopher Lloyd, it would’ve been an F. He could read the phone book as the Rev. Jim Ignatowski from “Taxi” and I’d enjoy it.)
It’s showing at Malcos in Tupelo, Oxford, Corinth and Columbus, as well as Hollywood Premier Cinemas in Starkville.

Look for movie reviews in Scene on Thursdays, and listen each Tuesday morning on Wizard 106.7 between 8:30 and 8:45 a.m.

M. Scott Morris/NEMS Daily Journal