M. SCOTT MORRIS: Hey, don't go slow because of ice, snow

By M. Scott Morris/NEMS Daily Journal

This won’t be a rant, and you’ll find no name-calling or questioning of ancestry. Sure, I’ve been angry at a few people lately, but with the passage of time, the outrage has diminished.
As a gesture of goodwill, I’m going to use neutral words to describe the events that, for the lack of a stronger phrase, annoyed me.
You’re aware, of course, of the recent snows. During the big one in January and during Wednesday’s snowfall, I had to be on the road.
Several times, people drove close to the rear of my car, and that made me uncomfortable on the snow- and ice-covered roads.
That’s as plain as I can describe it. I hope no one’s offended.
I’ve decided that fussing and fuming in the Mighty Daily Journal won’t change the way people drive. Fussing and fuming behind the wheel didn’t change anything either.
Nope, people are going to do what they’re going to do. Plenty of drivers are perfectly fine with seeing other cars and trucks stuck by the side of the road, and they find no reason to think, hey, that could be me if I’m not careful.
I can only assume it’s our collective dedication to speed that causes this behavior on messy roads.
While there are people who still believe in the idea of a leisurely drive, most of us are invested in trying to get from here to there as quickly as possible.
When put in those terms, I have to admit my own guilt. At times, I, too, have sacrificed my safety and the safety of others for the sake of speed.
It’s like the old political joke: “My opponent believes in a 55 mph speed limit because it saves 1 million lives a year. He’s a monster. Think of the millions of innocents he’s killing by not advocating a limit of 35 mph.”
I prefer 70 mph on Highway 78, and it’s not always easy to go 30 mph on some Tupelo roads, if you and your radar gun know what I mean.
Here’s what I told my wife when I got home on Wednesday: “These people wanted to go 30 with snow on the road.”
My wife: “It’s probably the only time they go the speed limit.”
Me: Uncomfortable silence because, first, that was a good line, so why didn’t I think of it? Second, 30 mph can seem terribly slow.
Even with people riding my tail during our recent snows, I wasn’t involved in any accidents. My tires lost purchase a couple of times, but it was nothing lightning fast reflexes couldn’t handle.
The only harm was the residual tension that came from contracting every muscle in my body while a vehicle was less than 20 feet behind my bumper. And, really, they make over-the-counter pills to fix that feeling.
In closing, I’m glad to be alive, and equally glad no squirrel, dog or child happened to run into the road, requiring a sudden, skidding and jarring stop.
I’m about ready for spring. How about you?
M. Scott Morris is a Daily Journal entertainment writer. Contact him at (662) 678-1589 or scott.morris@journalinc.com.