By M. Scott Morris/NEMS Daily Journal
The power to see into the future would come in handy right about now. I’m mainly concerned with the status of my 401(k). My fallback response to the stock market’s wild fluctuations is to plug my ears, cover my eyes and sing, “La-la-la-la-la-la-la.”
But wouldn’t it be nice to peer into a crystal ball and find out what my investments will be worth on the hour of my 65th birthday?
Who am I kidding?
I won’t be able to retire until 105, but I still want to know if the 401(k) will benefit my heirs.
I’m not exactly sure where I stand on the whole idea of psychic phenomena. Some friends of mine believe, others don’t. I tend to waver between belief and disbelief, depending on the time of day.
A buddy said it’s simple to sort out the fakes from the real deals at a psychic fair. The fakes will be smiling and welcoming, and the true seers will be huddled together, wearing black and drinking coffee.
“They’re not happy people,” he said.
So you start to wonder what they know about their 401(k)s, or maybe their depression comes from seeing apocalyptic misery around the corner. Then again, maybe it’s simply no fun talking with dead people all day.
It’s tough to tell for sure. As mentioned, I’m not exactly a skeptic and not exactly a believer. It depends on which way the wind blows during a particular moment in time, I suppose.
Another friend of mine isn’t a psychic, but he has the uncanny ability to shape the world around him to fit his needs. He’s downright Oprah-like.
Sounds pretty cool, huh?
I’ve learned never to doubt this guy.
He has a deep, abiding faith in Jesus Christ. He also has full confidence in himself and his ability to make things happen.
It took me a while to realize my friend is a walking, talking testament to the power of that mustard-seed belief mentioned in the Bible.
I’m sure he hits walls that he can’t overcome, but he usually finds a graceful way to go over, under or around those obstacles. And through it all, his hair is perfect.
I have other friends who believe if we point our thoughts in the same direction, miracles will occur. By “we,” they mean a critical mass of people praying to bring about a desired result.
Again, I waver between belief and disbelief, depending on the tides. In this mixed-up, muddled-up world, I’m not sure it’s possible to get enough people to agree to focus on the same thing. Even if we can agree, I suspect our conflicting hopes and dreams might distract us when we should be concentrating the hardest.
But I’m ready to make a deal with anybody who’s willing. It’s a simple plan, though it might take several years before we know if it works.
You think positive thoughts about my 401(k), and I’ll think positive about yours. If we’re successful, you’re invited to one heck of a retirement party on my 105th birthday.
M. Scott Morris is a Daily Journal feature writer. Contact him at (662) 678-1589 or firstname.lastname@example.org.