By Patsy R. Brumfield/NEMS Daily Journal
I am alive, barely, which entitles me to rant for myself and the untold thousands who undoubtedly faced this ridiculous situation during the past six months.
Midday Tuesday, I headed home for lunch going north on Gloster Street.
I was driving in the right-hand lane on the five-lane street. That means someone else was on my left side between me and the turn lane.
As traffic moved along beside the numerous fast-food restaurants, suddenly, to my abject horror came a much larger, silver-painted sedan – cutting straight and perpendicular into my path – undoubtedly to get from the turn lane into a restaurant parking lot.
Problem was, the driver apparently decided he could cross two lanes of oncoming traffic with impunity.
Almost as annoying, it appears in frightening hindsight, the driver to my left apparently stopped to allow silver-boy in front of me, without regard to whether I was moving or not. I have no statistics, but I’d be willing to bet that this multi-lane maneuver from the turn lane across two other opposite-running lanes is a leading cause of Tupelo traffic accidents.
A close friend, who shall remain nameless, actually committed this maneuver several months ago on North Gloster and luckily wound up only with a totaled SUV. Lunch at Fried Fish Heaven could never be worth the financial and physical aggravation this cross-lane potential poses.
Certainly, there is nothing wrong with getting into the turning lane and then crossing the opposing two lanes to reach your destination. But friends, it’s only a good idea when nothing is coming straight at you.
Am I wrong? When my hands stopped shaking on Tuesday, I wanted to turn around, find silver-boy and choke him senseless. I am advised that such an act would have constituted a crime, but I think I’ve got enough lawyer friends to beat that one on temporary (?) insanity.
I’ve reviewed the near-mishap several times in my feeble brain. There I am, heading home after shipping off an Easter gift to my precious daughter and beau. I’m thinking about a happy weekend with my son and his bride. And then, lo and behold, the shark-toothed front of silver-boy glides directly into my path. I slam on the brakes, and my poor little red Honda must still be asking what the heck happened.
“Did you honk your horn?” my friend Joe replied after I told the near-tragic details of my harrowing noon-hour experience. I don’t remember, I said to him. I’m lucky and so is silver-boy.
The entire front of my vehicle could have been knocked away and I could have wound up with a wide range of soft-tissue injury, at my tender age. I could have spent Holy Week and Easter weekend in traction. Boy, would I have been mad! And one of those lawyer friends would have been very busy. Silver-boy, consider that you got off pretty darn easy this time. Just don’t do it again.
Patsy R. Brumfield seeks to avoid vehicular conflict, whenever possible. Contact her at firstname.lastname@example.org.